i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
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