This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize