Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
You're a waste of cheezeits
how does that bad decision feel?
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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