I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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