How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
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