with your own penis?
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
