I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Randomize
