so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Randomize
