I want to stick my p in your. b.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
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