I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
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