How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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