Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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