Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
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