I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Shame - the story of my life.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
