ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize