We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
that's an acceptable place to lick
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize
