I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
