So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I just googled if crying burns calories
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
