So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
