And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize
