he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Randomize
