Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
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