Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Randomize
