So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
