Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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