It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize