Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Randomize
