My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
