I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
