dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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