He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
Randomize
