I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
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