its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
