You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Randomize