yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
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