I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize