She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize