wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize