**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
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