sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
Randomize
