she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Randomize
