You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
did you just send me my own nude
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize
