my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
I have tasted many bathrooms
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