You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
