We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
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