Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize