That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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