i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
