Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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