He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
