she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize